waiting on the hurricane

well sitting here watching the rain, supposed to get a little worse later, mostly rain and some wind. i kinda like storms. anyway have posted much lately as not much has been happening. we are getting ready to move soon to new house, there is a lot of work to be done. kinda glad, i need to get re-focused and doing the things necessary to recover. i spoke with my daughter for first time in a couple of weeks the other day. hearing her voice was the highlight of the month so far, God i miss her, was really thinking about her today as this is the kinda day where we would eat junk food and lay back and watch her favorites shows. my dream is that i someday be in a position to take care of her and my son. it is that dream that keeps me going, my depression has not really improved, its the not got much worse either but i must find things in life that give me joy and purpose. i think once we me and start to do some work on house and myself i will at least find that purpose. there have been people here for me through all my ups and downs and my drama and are still hanging in there with me and i  am grateful, my plan is to put that gratitude to work by maybe helping others. i know its going to be a process and i must learn patience but hopefully i will get there. anyway just wanted to check in and let people know i am still around. i ask of all you to pray for my children while they deal with the loss of their mother and i will kindly do the same for others......god bless and have a safe day